For Mothers of Difficult Daughters; How to Enrich and Repair the Relationship in Adulthood
Author: Charney Herst
List Price: $19.00
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ISBN: 0375753184
Publisher: Random House (22 February, 1999)
Sales Rank: 142,461
Average Customer Rating: 3.56 out of 5
Customer Reviews
Rating: 5 out of 5
A good, useful guidebook for those with an open mind
I read the previous negative reviews of this book here, and I decided to read this book from cover to cover. Kudos to Charney Herst! It's about time someone said, "give mom a break" and to quit guilt tripping mothers so much. It's time for these adult daughters to take personal responsibility for their own actions. Things have gotten so out of hand in society today, there that it almost seems like a rite of passage for daughters to "hate" their mother in this day and age. I never could understand why is it people are so quick to blame mom's parenting for everything from drug abuse to international terrorism but if a person is a "success" a mom's influence is totally ignored. When was the last time you heard an Oscar winner thank their mother? While my adult daughter is not a "failure" or bad, she has made some lifestyle choices I'm not too happy about, and have had people say you should be ashamed for "letting" her do things. Thanks to Herst, I know I didn't "fail." I took comfort in the fact that Herst was not a "perfect" mom..only one who did the best she could. Herst never excused truly abusive and bad mothers for horrendous behavior, she only helps ordinary moms get rid of misplaced guilt, so that healing really can take place!
Rating: 1 out of 5
Unbelivable
Is Unbelievable How some one can be conciderd an Expert, when Her own family life has been in shambles, I guess practice what you preach is not something they teach you in school.
The book is based on clinical mumbo-jumbo. and has no basis in reality.
Just my own opinion
Rating: 5 out of 5
Reading this book repaired our relationship
How could I explain one child that was easy to get along with and another child that was not? They were raised the same way. I made parenting mistakes, but there weren't severe. Our home was loving, our marriage healthy, the children loved. Why was it so hard? This book offers solace to mother's who feel lost and terribly saddened by their difficult relationship with their daughter. It also offers excellent tips for improving your relationship with your daughter, without blaming either party. In my case, it was as simple as learning to hold back on offering advice and learning how to make sympathetic noises instead. Within just a few months, her screaming outbursts had stopped and I was no longer being wounded. One and a half years later, my daughter calls me her best friend. I learned how we all have a "perfect" daughter imagined in our mind and we must let go of those images and learn to love who our daughter is. It sounds simple, but it is not. People are born with different personalities and some people are naturally prickly and irritable. I appreciate the author who helped me see this and helped me see that I did not fail the daughter I love so much. Similar Products
When You and Your Mother Can't Be Friends : Resolving the Most Complicated Relationship of Your Life
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