If you are a perfectionist, you know that the desire to be perfect becomes an exercise in futility; you're never good enough no matter what you do. You can work harder, longer, smarter - it's just not enough. Dr. Basco's book first helps you determine if you actually are a perfectionist. After taking the self-assessment, I discovered I was a full-fledged perfectionist. And in my case, it was impacting my life in a negative way.
Part of the problem with perfectionists goes back to their early beliefs and expectations. Basco shows how these early thoughts influence us to become perfectionists. She also shows how uncontrolled perfectionism can destroy relationships at every level. Uncontrolled, it can ruin lives.
That's why this book is so valuable. The author shows perfectionists how to begin the road to recovery, and how to stay on it. If perfectionism is influencing your life and those around you in a negative or hurtful way, you must read this book. I'm thankful I found it. It has made a huge difference.
263 pages
Personally, all of the aspects on the self-assessment are important to me. I apologize if it's not helpful. But I care about how I look. I care about how others perceive me. I need to be organized and detail-oriented. In today's competitive marketplace, it is usually the "perfectionist" who gets the job, not the one who with a half-hearted approach. The message here from Dr. Ramirez is that the "3's" and "4's" on the importance scale are meant to count against us, that we need "help"(!) For these reasons, this book is only suited for someone extremely obsessed to a point ad ridiculum. And in that case, they would think the whole book is mistake as a perceived threat to their way of life. Only a small minority of citizens could possibly benefit, therefore, but I think the author was expecting a broader readership, and therefore more money. I don't see the book taking off. The central message is that it is wrong to expect rewards, to expect recognition, to receive praise from others. It is not a matter of flattering one's vanity. It's about effort in an extremely competitive world, where mistakes are not tolerated. I sense the author's reproach at trying to be the absolute best at anything in life, and her indirectly labeling effort as a character defect. Sometimes we NEED to be a perfectionist. Sure, the author is a also a doctor. She doesn't have to try as hard, because financially she's already set. But most things in life come down to income level, and when you're hovering at the poverty level the only way up is to go out of your way to ensure details are attended to. If that makes me a perfectionist, so be it. Perhaps one day it will pay off.
The caption boxes scattered throughout the pages contain exact repetitions of passages found in the main text that serve only as filler. As a result, between that and the duplicate self-assessment pages, this book could have easily been reduced to half the total number of pages. The heart of the author's message is: "Don't overdo it." Okay, okay, I got it. But I knew that already. You made your point.