The Second Wives Club: Secrets for Becoming Lovers for Life
Author: Lenore Fogelson Millian, Stephen Jerry Millian
List Price: $14.95
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ISBN: 1582700141
Publisher: Beyond Words Publising (20 October, 1999)
Sales Rank: 33,986
Average Customer Rating: 4.55 out of 5
Customer Reviews
Rating: 5 out of 5
A good read for anyone.
As parents of a second wife, we found Lenore and Stephen Millian's book illuminating - and exhilarating.
Rating: 4 out of 5
Dealing with HIS and HER friends in Rockville
Overall, I liked this book. I found the section on dealing with "his" friends from the previous marriage very helpful and could relate a lot of the vignettes to my own situation. My husband's friends (who all are still in touch with his first wife) don't really accept me yet. The Second Wives Club book helps my husband and I get through those awkward situations gracefully and with a lot less conflict.
Rating: 4 out of 5
On the money...
Written by a second husband and wife team, this book is "designed to help you and your husband become lifelong lovers," and the authors tell us up front that "Knowledge is power; ignorance is vulnerability." That theme is prevalent throughout the book and makes it a helpful companion so that a second wife can identify and work to solve her problems. Everything is the book is based on the acronym LOVERS, and these points are factored into each solution and idea:Loyalty
Openness
Value of Trust
Empathy
Respect
Stability of Commitment
We have to deal with a history we may not like or understand, and the difficulties can escalate into crises quickly. The average second marriage lasts only 4.5, years, the authors say, so many of us are struggling. Much of the book is devoted to transcripts from couples in counseling. You'll identify with many of the challenges they discuss.
The authors cover six problem areas, including the ex-wife, the kids, grandkids, the mother-in-law, friends, and damaging memories. Each section includes a quiz and responses and behaviors that will help you deal with the issues of your family.
You'll also see a "How to Find Your Challenge" quiz at the end where you can learn just how serious your problems are. Finally, there are "Help Yourself Tools" that include relaxation exercises, communication skills, problem solving tips and more. This book is straight talk specifically to the second wife -- when you've been there, you understand.
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